Humor with a cold wet nose

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Top5 Pets is owned by
Chris White

Top 50 Pet Sites

               Do not place your pet on the counter.
                      The receptionist bites.

                           April 1, 2002

                      NOTE FROM THE LIST VET:

  The List Vet has deep respect for service and guide animals yet
   as a cat person she has often wondered why the good samaritan
  jobs always seem to be taken by dogs. So she asked the Top5 Pets
contributors to explain it to her. Did they ever set her straight!

               The Top 8 Reasons Cats Aren't Used as
                    Guide Animals for the Blind

  8> The fire department has better things to do than constantly
     rescuing the two of you from treetops, all tangled up in the
     leash and surrounded by barking dogs.

  7> Too high a risk of becoming disoriented while Snowball chases
     her own tail.

  6> First bird they spot and you're a wet stain on the 3rd Avenue
     bus lane.

  5> Involuntary 2-mile sprints after every dog encounter.

  4> They weave in and out of your ankles a few times and next thing
     you know you're being treated for a broken jaw.

  3> Sunny spot in the middle of the road? Nap time!

  2> Too many injuries caused by slipping on hairballs.

              and the Number 1 Reason Cats Aren't Used
                 as Guide Animals for the Blind...

  1> That daily jump to the top of the refrigerator is a killer.

              [   Copyright 2002 by Chris White    ]
              [       ]

Selected from 28 submissions from 11 contributors.
Today's Top5 Pets List authors are:
Mary Ann McDonald, Sacramento, CA        -- 1, 8 (2nd #1)
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX                   -- 2
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA            -- 3, 8, Topic
Virgil Steigerwald, Cleveland, OH        -- 4, Runner Up list name
Kathy Good, Scottsdale, AZ               -- 4
Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL                -- 5
Dawson E. Rambo, Santa Rosa, CA          -- 6
Judith E. Cottrill, Bronx, NY            -- 7
Arlington Animal Hospital, Arlington, VA -- Banner Tag
Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA               -- List Vet

      Reasons Cats Aren't Used as Guide Animals for the Blind
                RUNNERS UP list  --  Out of Service

Cats obey traffic signals with the same slavish devotion they give
their owners.
           (Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA)

"Dammit, Fluffy! I said I wanted to go to the library, not the
fish market!"
           (Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA)

One cloudburst and you're stuck at home for days.
           (Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA)

The cat would be too busy playing with the leash to take you
           (Kate Melnyk, Dedham, MA)

The naps in the sun are nice, but the mad dashes in between are
           (Martin Bredeck, Hybla Valley, VA)

They move too slowly when they scoot their butts across busy
           (Judith E. Cottrill, Bronx, NY)

Runner Up list name
           (Virgil Steigerwald, Cleveland, OH)

[      Copyright 2002 by Chris White   All rights reserved.      ]
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