TOP5 PETS

Humor with a cold wet nose

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             Three doggy biscuits, same as in town.


                          March 10, 2003


                    The Top 8 Barnyard Haikus


 8> Need to lay some eggs
    Farmer wants chicken tonight
    Lay eggs now! Chop, chop!

 7> A cloned sheep farm
    Early death from pre-aged genes
    Ewe, that's disgusting

 6> Run, run little sheep
    Head for safety of meadow
    Joe-Bob took blue pills

 5> How do you describe
    Rooster coprophilia?
    Cock-a-doodle-doo

 4> Yon mare entices
    Why then do I not respond?
    I am a gelding

 3> Old farmer he comes
    Our eggs gone, our milk stolen
    Tonight we get him

 2> I feel no pleasure
    The bulls do not give me joy
    Insemination


           and the Number 1 Barnyard Haiku...


 1> The neighbor's cattle
    You graze in my fields? Begone!
    For you're not my kine



             [   Copyright 2003 by Chris White    ]
             [       http://www.topfive.com       ]


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Selected from 32 submissions from 12 contributors.
Today's Top5 Pets List authors are:
------------------------------------------------------------------
Larry Hollister, Concord, CA        -- 1 (6th #1)
RW Lipp, Lenexa, KS                 -- 2, 4
Kim Walker-Daniels, Sun Prairie, WI -- 3
Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY      -- 5
Brad Wilkerson, El Sobrante, CA     -- 6
Adam Chunn, Houston, TX             -- 7, 8
Virgil Steigerwald, Cleveland, OH   -- Topic, RU list name
James Knowles, Bellingham, WA       -- Banner Tag
Sandra Hull, Arlington, VA          -- List Vet

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                         Barnyard Haikus
             RUNNERS UP list -- No Rhyme or Reason
------------------------------------------------------------------

"The sky is falling!"
Don't worry, Chicken Little
That's only an axe
          (Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)

I've never seen a
Purple cow but maybe that's
'Cause I don't do drugs
          (Jeffrey Anbinder, New York, NY)

My cow gives no milk
She's lactose intolerant
Such an udder shame
          (Melanie Stephens, Manassas, VA)

Sheep are so picky
A wool sweater for Christmas?
They're all "Baaaa, humbug"
          (Larry Hollister, Concord, CA)

The bull is horny
No, not tonight said the cow
I'm not in the mooooood
          (Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS)


Runner Up list name
          (Virgil Steigerwald, Cleveland, OH)

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