TOP5 PETS
Humor with a cold, wet nose

~ BANNER TAGS ~

What's a banner tag?

That little blurb thingy that appears at the very tip-top of a published list. It is a one-liner not necessarily associated with the topic of the list that follows. It's just there to set the tone for what follows, i.e. hilarious humor of a funny nature. The pet-relateder the banner tag, the better. See the list of banner tags used so far.

How do I submit a banner tag?

Send banner tags with SUBMIT - TAG in the subject line to Top5Pets@topfive.com. Multiple banner tag suggestions in a single e-mail are ok. No need for your code; just put your name in there somewhere so we know whom to credit.

Banner Tags Used as of 5/17/04:

 
We're going to snatch that pussy and put him in a box and bring him on the airplane.
The next yuppie pet: Miniature Lap Llamas!
The list with six nipples.
Finicky, schminicky.
To err is human, to forgive canine.
Now completely worm-free!
Woof Woof Bo Boof Banana Fanna Fo Foof Fee Fi Mo Moof... Woof!
Which end did that come out of?
No beagles were bamboozled to make this list possible.
Thumper Fi
No canaries were criticized to make this humor list possible.
The list that ruined your favorite chair.
Contains Only Dolphin Safe Beef
Look what the cat yakked up!
Contains tuna and tuna by-products.
The grass is always greener in the other bowl.
Who knows? I'm eatin' it anyway.
They will now be called "Freedom" Poodles.
I'm gonna get me some bits!
See Spot run.
Hot deity dog!
The list with a thick winter coat
Snausages.
Food Slut. And Proud of It.
Just say meow
Tastes nothing at all like chicken.
You'd better watch out, Machine Gnu Kelly
Set shock collars on stun, Mr. Sulu.
How Much Is That Doggie On The Menu?
Fluffy loved me this I know; The pet psychic told me so
A whole new way to get some tail.
When life hands you tetras, make tetrazzini.
Even a dog can shake hands
With Soft Meaty Center
What would Scooby Doo?
Cat People Know
Extra Absorbent for Multi-Cat Households
Thinking outside the box since 2001
Sit-and-stay with us for a while.
The Taste Cats Love
A tail-waggin' good time!
Enough humor to gag a maggot
Don't mind me, I'll just sit on the book you're reading.
Urinary Tract pH Balanced
With "Savory Nuggets"
"A tuna, a tuna, My kingdom for a tuna!"
Serve whine before dinner
I love you, I adore you, now give me that tuna, peon.
Don't you wish you could scoot like that?
What Would Lassie Do?
Dog carries less than $20 in biscuits.
Original Recipe
Beware of Dog… selling Amway products.
Honk if you can't woof.
Riots in the streets, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!
Cuddly like a bunny... with fangs
I read the gnus today, oh boy ...
Three doggy biscuits, same as in town
Out Eat, Out Shed, Out Nap
Thou shalt not whine
Feed recommended quantity all at one time.
Better looking than that freakin' poodle!
Available in 4 delicious flavors
No deposit, no return
Pop Goeth Before the Weasel
Got Milkbone?
Now, with 26% fewer carcinogens!
Throw the friggin stick already
Dude! You're getting a Dell box to sit in.
Habitrails to you.
Also available in a 12 pouch variety pack
Not just another pretty package
It's good for the carpet, honest.
No bad gags
Let us spray
Nearer My Dog to Thee
Happy Trails, Spike
Reclose pouch to keep list contents moist and fresh
Enlarged to show detail.
Refrigerate unused portion.
Helps Prevent and Eliminate Hairballs
Real Chicken is the #1 ingredient
It's a Dog Thing - you wouldn't understand
RIP Nobby
Purr and the world purrs with you. Hit the litterbox and you're on your own.
I barf therefore I am
Contains humor and humor by-products
Where Nutritious Meets Delicious
Resealable for freshness
Don't bother me.  I'm washing.
Use only as directed. Should symptoms persist, consult a veterinarian.
Made with Real Beef
Give Pekes a Chance
Cat Hair - The Timeless Fashion Accessory
Tanker, tanker very much.
One lump or two?
Do Not Administer to Kittens Less Than 8 Weeks of Age
Developed by veterinarians
Like a monkey on a cupcake
Caution:  Keep fingers away from list
Do not place your pet on the counter. The receptionist bites.
Nyet, Ya koshka
Not for human consumption
Do not overfeed
Don't mind me.  I'll just sit here by my dish and slowly starve to death.
Talk to the paw
That's "Top 35" in dog lists, you know
For Veterinary Use Only
The place to go for heavy petting
Sponsored by Worldwide Pets
Must be the puppy chow
R.I.P. Buddy
New Hairball Prevention Formula!
Kills fleas dead
Dogs are from Mars, Cats are from Venus, Goldfish are from Woolworth's
3 paws and a hook
Felines... nothing more than felines...
Kibbles, bits, whatever
I shed therefore I am.
Slippers - the other white meat.
Et Tu Fluffy?
Toucan play this game.
Feed list a raw egg once a week to promote glossy coat.
More driveway than is fit to drag your butt across
100% stain resistant
Cats ask for it by name!
Recommended by top breeders
Curb your humor
Who're you callin' FLUFFY ?!?
All Your Tuna Are Belong To Us
"Hi. My name is Rex. I drink from the toilet."
Bailiff! Clean that up!
Please do not tap the sides of the list
Add water to make delicious gravy
Current vaccines required
For assistance, contact the whelp desk.
Filter?  We don't need no steenking filter.
Now with *new* chewy bits!
Thou shall have no other cats before me, or I shall be an angry, hissing cat.
Genuine cuttlebone
No animals were harmed during the making of this list.
All contributors have been spayed or neutered.
Conforms to breed standard.
New ultra-clumping formula.
Guaranteed free of fecal parasites.
Best if used by 4/15/01
Cut twice the size of cage floor, then fold in half.
Where's the love for the ferret?
Scratch-and-sniff here.
If you're happy and you know it wag your tail
Please do not litter.